Internet Pornography and Church Kids

Yesterday at lunch, a youth worker reported that 58 out of 62 high school boys in a church youth group held their hands up during a retreat session that they regularly viewed internet pornography.

I'm aware that internet pornography is a huge business, which means that lots of people go there. I was stunned, however, to learn that it was so pervasive among this group of upper middle class church kids. It's easy to be out of touch with reality.

This youth worker then talked about something to help -- a program that tracks every web site visited on a computer and sends an email record to a parent, wife, or other person the individual chooses to be accountable to. He uses one himself, and recommended one to the leaders of the youth group's church. And in fact, the leaders are taking the initiative to buy and install the software for their members.

One site that will provide a program of this type for free is www.xxxchurch.org. I am sure that there are other even more sophisticated programs available elsewhere.

I love the internet and the good things it offers -- but internet pornography is one where we need to take proactive measures, both for kids and adults.

We Need Community to Be Successful in Life

I’m fascinated that God created us with different personality types.

As I read another book on understanding personality types yesterday, I was again impressed that each type has strengths and weaknesses, and that only in community are we complete. Only together do we have all the strengths necessary to do a job well, to care for one another, and to have a complete understanding of a situation. This is just further proof that God intended us to function in communities – families, tribes, and churches.

Our different personality types also lead to conflict. We see things differently. We process things differently. We have different approaches to problem solving. We even have different ways of dealing with conflict based on our personalities. That means that in communities we must expect conflict and learn together how to deal with it. The differences are healthy because they allow us together to be better than any of us alone. But at the same time, we each must respect what others bring to the community and recognize the need for compromise and collaboration.

God often calls us to work within the strengths of our personality. When our work matches our personality strengths, everything seems easy – we’re in the “flow.” When our work doesn’t match our personality strengths, we usually find the work difficult, often struggle, and productivity and performance may be low. Finding our calling – work that matches the way God made us – is a great blessing. Those of us who are coaches and career counselors frequently help clients better understand the impact of personality traits on career choices and job satisfaction.

Interestingly, God also often calls us to work in areas where our personality does not provide strength. It is during these times that His strength can be displayed. And it is during these times that we see the value of partnering with others that have personality traits and skills that complement ours. Moses is a good example. Moses’ personality and skills were not a good match for negotiating with Pharaoh or for organizing and leading a nation. Yet, because of the power of God, and through partnering with others that had the needed traits and skills, Moses was effective.

So, some questions for thought:

1. How can I use the differences in personalities to improve the communities and organizations I am part of?
2. What types of people do I need to partner with to complement my natural strengths?
3. What types of work and ministry/volunteer efforts best match my personality traits?

Atheist, Theist, or Christian?

Christianity Today has an interesting article in the April 2005 edition on Antony Flew. Flew, one of the world's leading philosophers, recently changed his mind about God, from being an Atheist to becoming a Jeffersonian Deist. He now believes in God as Creator, or Designer. He is careful to point out that he is not a Christian.

Here's what Flew says holds him back from Christianity:

1. He has an unshakable view against the supernatural. He believes that the laws of nature are so well established that he has no difficulty ignoring testimonies about miracles.

2. "He detests any notion that a loving God would send any of his creatures to eternal flames."

Another important distinction between Theism and Christianity is found in another Flew quote:
"Why should God be concerned about what his creatures think about him anymore than he should be directly concerned with their conduct?"

The question that occurred to me while reading this was, "How much has Theism influenced what some of us believe about God, and as a result affected our Christianity?"

• Do we believe and trust that God intervenes in supernatural ways? Today?
• Do we believe that God will punish as well as reward?
• Do we believe that God wants our worship?
• Do we believe that God is concerned about our conduct, about how we live our lives?

When we answer one or more of these questions in the negative, we move away from God as revealed in the Bible toward God defined by human logic. We move toward Theism and Atheism. We move away from hope.

What Should I Do Now That I'm a Christian?

...people would come to Frank Buckman and ask, 'What should I do now that I’m a Christian?'’ And he would ask them, 'What’s the most important question or issue that’s being faced in your country right now?'’ Then his answer would be, ‘"Why don’t you go work on that until God gives you something else to do.'’

(I lifted this quote from Bob Buford's new ACTIVEenergy.net newsletter. Bob is the founder of HalfTime, and this is his latest effort.)

Buckman's response to this timeless question is worthy of consideration by all of us. Often what we have heard, or maybe given, as the answer to this question is, "Just get involved doing all the church things -- become an active member."

The "church" answer leads us to become inward focused -- more focused on serving the church. Buckman's answer leads us to become outward focused -- more focused on serving the world around us. In my life I've seen a lot more of us following the "church" answer. I'm now seeing increased movement by Christians toward Buckman's answer.

Which path has been your focus? Which path best fits your God-given abilities and passions? Which path do you see being your future focus? What about doing both?

Terri Schiavo

I don't know what to think about the Terri Schiavo situation. There is much information that pulls me both directions. Some of the information I process logically. Other information I process emotionally. I do recognize that there is much misinformation being put out, and at the same time I wonder if all the salient information needed to form an opinion is available. I just don't know.

But I do know it is a heart-tugging story that has captured our attention. It's the subject of conversation in almost any group. Good will come from all of us re-examining our thinking about the value of life as well as the value of being able to choose not to be kept alive artificially.

As I was scanning my favorite web news sites this morning, seeing among other things the headlines on Schiavo, I then went to read the blogs I normally scan as well. As I read Larry James' Urban Daily, I could not help but think about the fact that every day we pass by and ignore so many in need whose lives are just as valuable as Schiavo's. They too are hungry. They too need support for life to continue. But for some reason they are not in the headlines, the topic of conversation.

None of us has any power to do anything to change the Schiavo situation. But maybe we could redirect our aroused passion about the value of life to a situation where we could make a difference -- by helping provide food and shelter for the poor who live in our own neighborhoods.

The Coming Brain Drain

Anne Fisher has a good article on "How to Battle the Brain Drain" in the current issue of Fortune.

"The Brain Drain" is a term used to describe the loss of experienced workers from Corporate America. Part of this is occurring naturally through normal retirement, but it has been accelerated in recent years through programs encouraging workers over 50 to leave through early retirement. In fact, the current first retirement age in the U.S. is now about 57 due to this phenomenon. It is further exacerbated by the unusually large size of this age group. American business is losing its knowledge and experience at alarming rates. Fisher's article does a good job of discussing the problem and talking about some solutions that are being brought forth.

I was part of a group that worked on this issue during the transition period after Chevron bought Texaco. It is a difficult problem.

One major difficulty in solving the problem are our laws concerning retirement plans. But fortunately, there are moves afoot to change the laws to allow companies to offer phased retirement or to keep older workers employed on a part time basis without jeopardizing their retirement benefits. This will be a win-win for everyone.

Here are a couple of things we should all be thinking about:

1. Company leaders should develop formal strategies to both minimize and pass on as much of the knowledge of their older experienced workers as possible. This should include mentoring programs and other measures discussed in Fisher's article.

2. Company leaders, aware that much experience and knowledge is becoming available through early retirement, should develop strategies to gain access through innovative hiring policies.

3. Individuals over 40 should begin developing personal strategies for how they will continue working and contributing if they are part of the brain drain. There are many good options, but nearly all require some level of preparation and action before they can be put in place.

If you'd like to have a conversation about this, either as an employer or as an individual, let me know.

Controlling Immortality

From the April 2005 issue of Fast Company:

Fast Company: Would you want to be immortal if the opportunity presented itself?

Ray Kurzweil: I think the opportunity is presenting itself. Our mortality is something that should be in our hands. It's something I want in my hands. I believe we'll demonstrate a mouse that doesn't age within about a decade. And we'll translate that into human therapies.

Some Observations:

1. What Kurzweil and often maybe the rest of us often fail to see is that we already are immortal. When our focus is only on this physical life in this physical world, we don't recognize our immortality -- we see only aging leading to the ultimate expression of physical mortality, death.

2. The fact that we naturally desire immortality and that this physical world doesn't offer it should point us toward another world -- one that offers eternal life.

3. Isn't it interesting that our desire is to be in control of our own mortality -- through our own devices to create an end to aging and death due to aging? We want to become God.

4. Why is it that when we are already immortal and have a God who has provided that for us that we don't want to follow His way, but come up with our own solution?

5. The more successful we are in dealing with our physical world, the less attention we pay to God who created our physical world.

This reminds me of the people building the tower of Babel who thought that through their actions they could become equal to God.

What is it that you and I are focused on in this physical world that heads the same direction?